How to get rid of computer addiction in adolescents and children: advice from a psychologist

Concerns regarding their children’s screen time are common among parents today. With tablets, laptops, and smartphones becoming more and more commonplace, it’s simple for children and teenagers to become engrossed in the digital world.

Although technology has its uses, excessive use of it can result in issues like poor concentration, a lack of social interaction, and even addiction. Setting boundaries can be difficult for parents, particularly in light of how ingrained screens are in modern life.

It’s critical to know how to steer kids away from excessive screen time. This post will provide professional guidance from psychologists on how to assist your child in developing a healthy balance and preventing computer addiction.

Advice Description
Set Clear Time Limits Establish specific time limits for computer use and stick to them. Make sure your child understands the rules and the reasons behind them.
Encourage Physical Activities Encourage outdoor activities and sports to create a healthy balance between screen time and physical exercise.
Create a Tech-Free Zone Set certain areas in your home where technology is not allowed, such as the dining room or bedrooms.
Be a Role Model Demonstrate balanced tech use yourself. Children often imitate their parents’ behavior.
Offer Alternative Hobbies Help your child discover new hobbies or interests, such as drawing, reading, or playing an instrument, to reduce their reliance on screens.
Talk Openly Discuss the dangers of excessive screen time and internet addiction. Make sure your child feels heard and understands your concerns.
Use Parental Controls Install software that helps monitor and limit screen time. Use these tools to ensure your child follows the agreed limits.

Diagnosis or hobby?

As of yet, there is no agreement on this issue. The diagnosis of "computer addiction" is not included in the International Classification of Diseases, despite annual discussions about its inclusion. However, a growing number of medical professionals believe that computer addiction is a disease, much like drug and alcohol addiction. Twenty-six participants in a German experiment were shown screenshots from their preferred video games. When shown a bottle of alcohol or a dosage of drugs, people’s reactions were exactly the same as those seen in alcoholics and drug addicts.

Twelve out of every 7,000 persons are statistically dependent on online computer games. Of the 250 million Facebook users, 19% acknowledged having a gaming addiction.

The most powerful addiction is brought on by online gaming. A teenage girl in China passed away from exhaustion in 2005. She spent several days playing World of Warcraft. A 17-year-old boy in Bashkiria passed away a year later from an epileptic seizure he had suffered after spending many days on the computer. The depressing statistics go on because these kinds of cases have been occurring more frequently lately.

It’s no secret that kids who spend too much time playing violent video games can instigate fights in real life. Serial killings and massacres orchestrated by Japanese and American schoolchildren.

A passion for video games is not harmful in and of itself. When does it become dependent, though? The following are the primary indicators that your child is an Internet addict or a gamer:

  • He began to communicate less on abstract topics. All conversations are around your favorite game.
  • He is not interested in studying, He stopped visiting sections, or does it extremely reluctant.
  • The child spends all free time at the computer. Any attempts to make him turn off the technique lead to a scandal. Parents" attempts to limit time after the monitor cause a child to attacks crying, rage, hysteria.
  • The child has become more irritable, He often and for no reason changes his mood – from excitement, he easily goes to the depressive spleen.
  • He does not know how to control his time spent at the computer. He says that he will play for two hours, but he can sit for much longer.
  • The child has stopped taking care of himself – without a reminder, he may forget to wash, brush his teeth, change his clothes.
  • He has no friends left. He hardly communicates with anyone.
  • Your child has “memory gaps”. Short-term memory suffers, he may not remember what he said or promised a few hours ago.

You should act immediately if you discover three or more matches in this list. These days, there are online tests that you can take to determine your risk of becoming addicted to computers by answering a series of questions. Although they are primarily subjective and cannot provide a precise diagnosis, they can aid in forming an overall understanding of the issue.

Reasons

The majority of kids enjoy spending time on computers. Why, though, do some people become addicted while others do not? Why does some child find it easy to correct their behavior and others find it hard? It all comes down to your children’s individual traits: their nervous system organization, temperament, and degree of self-esteem.

Teens who lack self-assurance and communicate infrequently outside of the home are more likely to develop an addiction to online communication. He will discover what he is missing in life there.

Youngsters who experience a lot of anxiety or fear frequently "get hooked" on heroic computer epics. They like to think of themselves as an all-powerful character in the game, capable of using one hand to defeat hordes of monsters. In this instance, the child somewhat makes up for the real lack of bravery and tenacity.

All of this is well known to game developers, who strive to enhance their offering each year with better sound, 3D graphics, and a presence-based experience. Everything in the game is designed to make the player feel "real." Compared to adults, children are easier to captivate, have a more malleable mentality, and believe things happen more quickly. Because of this, there are currently more than 20 children in our nation who suffer from computer addiction for every adult who does.

What is actually taking place? The child no longer sees the world in the same way. He loses the greatest aspects of humanity, such as empathy, love, and honesty, as his computer addiction worsens.

The people who are most prone to become addicted to gadgets are:

  • Children suffering from attention deficit. Parents pay little attention to them, and then their peers ignore them. The best prevention in this case is love and participation in the child"s life.
  • Children – cholerics and children – melancholics. Their perception of the world is special even without computers. Children with such temperaments "get used to" the proposed circumstances easier than others.
  • Children from "problem" families. We are talking about families where domestic violence is practiced – scandals, beatings, coercion to do something. And even if the victim of violence is another family member, the child will psychologically strive to escape from this uncomfortable reality to another. Why not in a virtual? The same partially applies to families where the parents have recently divorced, and the child still finds it difficult to accept changes.
  • Children who are not accustomed to saving time. If the child has not been taught from childhood to manage his time rationally, then by the age of 10-12 he has too many free minutes and hours. He sincerely believes that the duty to clean the room or take out the trash can be postponed for later. It is much more interesting to spend time in virtual reality. Without parental control, such children will not lift a finger around the house, but will sit down at the computer with great pleasure.
  • Children suffering from complexes. A girl who does not like her own appearance gets a chance to become a beautiful warrior in a computer game. A shy and timid boy manages to be a hero – a winner. The game fills the voids in the child"s soul, and gradually he ceases to be himself, but becomes a character in the game.

Consequences

Addiction to computers can have very negative outcomes:

  • Social isolation, the child"s lack of ability to communicate and negotiate.
  • Nervous and mental personality disorders – psychosis, clinical depression, hysteria, schizophrenia.
  • Difficulties with learning, lack of motivation.
  • Asocial behavior, lack of understanding of the boundaries of what is permitted, including the law. As a result, the child can become a criminal.
  • Diseases: gastritis, poor posture, hemorrhoids, chronic fatigue syndrome, exhaustion of the whole body, gastric ulcer and duodenal ulcer, myopia, glaucoma, "dry eye syndrome", farsightedness, display syndrome.

Help

A child can be helped in a number of ways to overcome their addiction to computers. However, you must consider the severity of the addiction. Sometimes parents are able to assist their child on their own, and other times they require the assistance of professionals.

Educational conversation

A great method in the early stages of addiction. It’s critical to comprehend the root causes of addiction. Why is a child on the other side of the screen having a better experience than you? Typically, parents make the mistake of lecturing their children about the risks associated with computers, creating a fuss, and trying to appeal to their conscience. This will all just aggravate him. Strive to befriend someone.

Play his favorite game with your child for the evening. Play and talk with him. Allow him to describe to you each character’s traits and abilities. Ask the child, with caution, why he prefers to be this hero over another during the virtual adventures. He needs so many weapons, but why? With whom is he at odds? There will be communication, maybe not on this particular occasion. However, once you determine for yourself what draws your child to the game, you’ll be able to arrange his free time somewhat differently, including that crucial element that is currently absent.

Psychoanalysis

Currently, this is the most widely used strategy for treating computer addiction in both adults and children. A skilled psychoanalyst can assist in identifying the genuine motivations behind departing for an alternate virtual world. A specialist may be able to accurately identify the family issues, personal complexes, or moral traumas that are forcing the child into a different dimension after just one session. It is recommended that parents take part in counseling.

Positive outcomes are guaranteed if the entire family approaches the task with a genuine desire to improve their lives. Parents must be willing to make changes to their own habits, way of life, and character as the primary requirement. Psychoanalysis is not a cheap profession. However, this approach works best when the addiction has long since progressed past its early stages.

Hypnosis

About ten years ago, psychotherapists started using hypnosis to treat computer addiction. Enough experience has been accumulated. With the parents’ permission, the hypnotist induces a trance in the child and carefully provides psycho-settings for online communication and computer game indifference. This is the approximate code for alcoholics.

But don’t believe that hypnosis is a cure-all. First of all, not everyone is capable of hypnotization. Secondly, addiction symptoms might go away, but their underlying causes never do. Subsequently, the child, whose computer games have vanished from their life, will start to occupy the spaces with something else. It is untrue that with something beneficial and helpful. Some pathological conditions, such as drug addiction or theft, can take the place of computer addiction.

Medicines

To overcome computer addiction, drug treatment is frequently utilized (especially in the "advanced" stages). A doctor must prescribe prescription medications. This typically occurs when a child receives a diagnosis of anxiety, depression, or personality disorders. Antidepressants and sedatives are prescribed by a specialist.

It is imperative to state up front that medication and injections alone cannot cure computer addiction because they address symptoms rather than the root cause. Whatever someone may say, you cannot succeed without this psychological support and rehabilitation. Furthermore, a child’s body has never benefited much from the use of psychotropic medications.

Psychologist’s advice

  • If you have discovered a computer addiction in your child, don’t panic. You can frighten him with your reaction and drive him even deeper into a detached state. Analyze the situation and make a plan to get out of it.
  • Don’t shout, don’t blame your child. It’s not his fault. After all, weren’t we the ones who once gave him a gadget to occupy him for a while? Take responsibility for yourself and be patient. Computer addiction doesn’t go away quickly.
  • Find a good time to talk to your son or daughter. Look for the reason for his voluntary withdrawal into virtuality.
  • Offer your child interesting ways to spend his leisure time. Remember, they should be in tune with the cause of the addiction. If a timid child is carried away by games to feel omnipotent, send him to a boxing section, karate, organize a parachute jump. If your teenager lacks thrills in everyday life, suggest going out together on a weekend and playing paintball or taking part in an interactive quest in reality. They are common now. There, the child will be able to feel like the same hero, but for real. If your son or daughter has problems with communication, enroll the child in a theater studio, dance classes, anywhere where the principle “we are a team” applies.

  • Set goals for the dependent child. And gradually teach him to set goals independently and go for them.
  • You should not forbid him to sit at the computer or take away his gadget, trying to wean him off the tablet by force. This will cause aggression and resentment. And these feelings do not contribute to establishing contact.
  • Designate to the child the range of his responsibilities. Homework, cleaning, walking the dog, taking out the trash. Don"t be afraid to overload him. No one has ever died from household chores. Reward for what you have done, but not with additional time at the computer. Set up a reward system yourself. What it could be? A small amount of money that a child can save up for the sneakers of his dreams or something else he wants.
  • Computer addiction is rapidly becoming younger. If 10 years ago, 14-16-year-old teenagers suffered from it, now you can meet mothers who complain that they cannot kick their 4-5 year old child out from behind the monitor. If the child is not yet 10 years old, try to strictly dose the time spent in the game. Preferably, no more than half an hour a day. And it is best to find an alternative activity, the computer is not the best toy for small children.
  • Be prepared to change yourself. Together with your child, you will jump with a parachute, learn to roller skate, go fishing or dance. Remember that he cannot cope with the addiction alone.
  • Don"t relax. As in the treatment of alcoholism or drug addiction, the patient may have relapses, breakdowns. It would seem that you managed to distract the child from "tanks" and "war", but you quarreled, and he again distances himself, trying to hide in the game.

You need to know your enemy by sight

Parents who have children who are excessively dependent on games and the Internet should be aware of which games are the most mentally damaging and addictive.

The Sims, the horror game Five Nights at Freddy’s, Second Life, Prototype, Left 4 Dead 2, Fallout 3, Splatterhouse, and World of Warcraft are among the games on this list, according to experts. Children and teenagers have been fully engrossed in "World of Tanks" lately.

“Tanks” are not as bloody as “Splatterhouse”, where severed limbs and skin torn off enemies are the norm, not barbarity, but they have their own nuances. Playing “Tanks” requires monetary investment – ​​after all, the equipment needs to be improved (“pumped up”). Where will the child get money? That’s right, from his parents. And if they don’t give it to him, he can steal from strangers, since the desire to have the coolest tank at this moment is stronger than common sense meaning. I have seen adult men who "invest" most of their income in tanks, without thinking about the fact that they have families, children, obligations. What can we say about teenagers? Don"t spare the time, find out what your child is playing, try to play it yourself, get to know your enemy as well as possible.

You must constantly exercise caution if your child is addicted to the Internet. Pedophiles, fraudsters, and perverts of all colors have been waiting for kids online rather than at the door close to their house. Examine the social media groups your child is a part of. Has he or she become part of the "death group"? Teenagers in these communities are ready to end their lives. Among his or her contacts, are there any adults they don’t know?

For information on the social network safety code, visit Dr. Komarovsky’s School.

If we were to categorize every computer game as malicious, that would be unfair. There are, of course, educational games that improve memory, reasoning, and logic.

For example, my eldest son once studied the English alphabet. Winnie the Pooh from the game with a note 3 helped him in this+. When I noticed that my son in the 3rd grade, instead of going to school, was concentrating on destroying another batch of bloody zombies in "Left 4 Dead" with a shotgun, and when asked where we were going on the weekend, he answered: "Can I stay at home?», the question was put bluntly – either now or never. By the way, by that time my son weighed almost 70 kilos, suffered from stage 1 obesity, and did not want to go to any sections in principle. As soon as I turned away, he would grab his plate of dinner and go eat at the computer. As a holiday gift, he would ask for a new game or another disk with a sequel to the game..

I took him to the cadet school where he was taught how to disassemble an assault rifle, run and perform pull-ups, and jump with a parachute. Naturally, at first, he was extremely irrational, suffered, and grumbled. We were hardly shocked when he declared in the fifth grade that he would join the military. He is currently 17 years old. He is the Stavropol Presidential Cadet School graduate with honors. three foreign languages are being studied. He plans to enroll in a higher military school this summer. Becoming an intelligence officer is his dream job.

He uses an unprintable term to refer to his friends who play video games in their free time and questions how he manages to spend so much time at the computer. I am now appreciative of fate for allowing me to recognize the signs of addiction early on and take prompt action to prevent it. I’m watching my middle son right now. Addiction has not come up yet, but I’m always prepared.

Parents need to be patient, understanding, and persistent in their efforts to help their children and teenagers overcome their addiction to computers. It’s critical to establish boundaries and promote screen-free activities.

Clear and honest communication is essential. Discuss the dangers of excessive screen time with your child, and together you can design a healthy daily schedule that makes time for socializing, physical activity, and hobbies.

If the issue continues, consulting a psychologist for professional assistance may also be beneficial. Early intervention can help your child form healthy digital habits and avoid more serious consequences in the future.

Setting clear boundaries, promoting alternative activities, and encouraging open communication are all necessary components of a balanced strategy for helping kids and teenagers overcome their addiction to computers. Psychologists advise progressively cutting back on screen time, getting the whole family involved in non-digital hobbies, and making sure children feel encouraged rather than punished. The objective is to address the underlying emotional needs that may underlie the addiction and swap out excessive computer use for healthier routines.

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Svetlana Kozlova

Family consultant and family relationship specialist. I help parents build trusting relationships with their children and each other. I believe that a healthy atmosphere in the home is the key to happiness and harmony, which I share in articles and recommendations.

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